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Parashat Pinehas – Exclusiveness


I once visited a friend of mine who is a diamond dealer. As he guided me through his showcase, he pointed out one particular diamond: “That one is literally priceless,” he told me.

I didn’t quite get the difference – “a diamond is a diamond, is it not?” I asked him.

“Oh no,” he responded, “here’s the rule: the less people can get their hands on something, the more precious it becomes.”

“But how much does it cost?” I persisted.

“Honestly, in this caliber of diamonds, there really is no number. Standard costs don’t apply here. See, diamonds are expensive, but they have a price. Rare diamonds are priceless.”

Many wonder, is it possible to bring this economic rule of “less supply, greater value” to relationships? After all, the possibility of relationship implies that there is ample supply – one is open and accessible.

However, the very opposite is true. Indeed, the nature of relationships is exactly the same as economics: we want the inaccessible – that is where the drive is. In order to build a successful relationship that will never go stale, one must integrate a drive for the inaccessible into the relationship itself.

How so?

Establishing exclusiveness, by demonstrating that one is not accessible to all, is the key to a healthy relationship, a refresh button for a happy marriage. It’s the way we ensure that our “diamond” remains priceless.

It is the art of channeling that intense drive for the inaccessible within the framework of the accessible that holds the secret to creating beautiful and everlasting bonds.

~Rabbi Mendy